Letting Go

Ephesians 4:29-32
Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.  Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by Whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.  Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.  Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ has also forgiven you.


Observations:
More things to put on the list of what it looks like to be renewed in the spirit of the mind, and put on the new self:
Our speech should be wholesome, is good for the building up of the body, gives grace to the hearer.
Paul reminds us that we have been sealed by the Holy Spirit, and our lives should not bring Him grief.
We need to let go of ALL bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor (insistent shouting to be heard in public?), slander, and malice.
We need to be kind, tender-hearted, and forgiving. Remember our new self is in the likeness of God (4:24) and these are His characteristics.

Application:
We can't just look good, we need to be changed from the inside out.  These are characteristics that do not come naturally to us.  What strikes me immediately is that I talk too much, and I am not a person prone to a lot of words.  I have let a lot of things slip through my lips that never should have.  How many of us grew up with the saying, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."  Oh, we often try to cover it up as simply joking around, but I know how hard those kinds of words can bite and sting, whether meant in jest or not.

I feel I should take a moment here and address that word clamor.  Webster's defines it as, "noisy shouting, a loud continuous noise, insistent public expression."  I fear that all too often we believers engage in this kind of thing in the public forum.  1 Thessalonians 4:11 says, "make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you."  I am not sure but what we lose more to the enemy with our boisterous public outcries than converts to the Truth.  Just because the other side is always looking for a fight does not mean we have to give it to them.  This is one of those times when I really feel that God's way is not man's way.  Sometimes we just need to be quiet, both publicly and privately.

I read a great blog post related to this thought yesterday, "With the confidence of those who have been vindicated by the resurrection of Christ, we don't need to be vindicated by the culture.  That ought to free us to speak openly about what we believe, but with the gentleness of those who have nothing to prove.  Let's not boycott our neighbors.  Let's not picket or scream or bellow.  Let's offer a cup of cold water, or maybe a grande vanilla latted in Jesus' name."  (link to original blog post)


How easily we can be led down the path of bitterness and anger.  Somebody did us wrong.  Somebody injured our pride.  Isn't that where most of our bitterness and anger come from?  It is the old self rearing it's ugly head, the one that is focused on me, me, me.  Remember what comes at the end of these verses?  Be kind, tender-hearted, and forgiving.  That forgiveness is taken even further- we are to do it just as Christ forgave us.  How many hoops did we have to jump through for His forgiveness.  Is it conditional on me never failing again?  How many times have I asked Him to forgive me for the same thing I did just yesterday?

After our study Wednesday night one woman asked me about forgiveness.  How do we do it?  And are we supposed to forget?  I shared with her a little of my own experience and feel led to share with you as well.  I am a survivor of both sexual assault and a couple of sexually abusive encounters by trusted family members.  I carried around all kinds of baggage for years; anger, guilt, shame, fear.  My nights were often filled with nightmares.  All of that baggage I took with me into my marriage and it very nearly destroyed it.  I went through a healing process that started with forgiveness.  I was no longer able to confront two of the men involved, one had died and I had no clue who the other was.  They did not ever ask for my forgiveness.  But I chose to forgive them.  It was a long process and a lot of prayer for help from the Lord went into making me willing to forgive these men.  But there came a day when I knew that if they were to come to me I would be able to say to them, "I forgive you."  I couldn't wait for that day to come before I reached that point of forgiveness.  What I mean by that is, that if I had waited for them to come to me I would still be in a very dark place, because they were not coming.  For my own sake, for the sake of my marriage, my children, my family, the church, the Lord, I had to forgive.  And the Lord did a wonderful thing in that moment.  It was like being made new.  A relationship was restored.  No more nightmares, no more bitterness, no more putting upon my husband the wrongs of those other men.  And I have forgotten a lot, which really surprises me.  The face that haunted me, I no longer see.  Those moments of time in my life often feel foreign to me now.  I know they happened, but they have become rather blurry in my memory.  I had a right to be angry about what was done to me, but the choice I made about what to do with that anger for many years was sin.  Oh, there are not even words to truly convey the freedom that comes when we forgive.  Not words to convey the lifting of one's heart.  Not words to convey the changes in one's mind.   I am not here to say that the road to forgiveness is an easy one.  I am here to say that it really is true what they say; harboring unforgiveness is more harmful to us than the one who offended us.  I do want you to know that we have a Helper to see us through the process, to change our hearts, to heal our wounds, to set us free.  It is truly paradise with the Savior, and it can begin right now, today, if we will follow Him and do what He says.


Blessings,
Deb

The Choices We Make

Ephesians 4:25-28
Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth each one of you with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.  Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and do not give the devil an opportunity.  He who steals must steal no longer; but rather he must labor, performing with his own hands what is good, so that he will have something to share with one who has need.


Observations:
Therefore: what is it there for? Because we need to be renewed in the spirit of our minds, and put on a new self in the likeness of God there are some things we should/should not do.
Among them:
-put away lying, and speak only the truth
-when you are angry, do not let it cause you to sin
-do not steal, but labor for what you have, do your own work so that you will have something to share

Application:

Now on my wish list to read.

The new self deals with people differently.  The new self seeks the good of others and does not live for itself.  Evidence of this new life is seen in that we speak the truth.  I recently listened to a fellow speak about committing to not tell a lie of any kind for one whole year and he has written a book about it.  At first I thought, "So what's the big deal, that is not so hard."  But as I listened I became so convicted.  Have you ever told someone, "No, I never got your message?" "I'll call you."  Or how about, "I will pray for you."  What about in worship?  Do you really mean the words you are singing? "All to Jesus I surrender?"

Anger is something that is going to happen, but what I choose to do with it is entirely up to me.

I find it interesting what Paul says is the purpose of our labor.  It seems obvious that we should not steal.  It seems obvious that we should labor with our own hands for what we have, and that the work we do should be good.  But the reason we are to labor like this?  So that we will have something to share with the one who has need.  When I think about my own labor, which at this time in my life involves writing and preparing this Bible study, I see it fitting very well.  What about that labor that puts food on my table, a roof over my head, provides clothes and trips and whatever else we can imagine?  How am I doing at sharing the fruits of that labor with the person in need?  I am immediately convicted by the way the size of our closets have grown over the years.  What once fit neatly in a little dresser and on a few hangars now requires its own room in our homes.  Perhaps a part of what this idea is calling me to is a simplifying of my life.  How much stuff do I really need to have?  Oh, I am good about rationalizing it all, but in our time, is this one of the ways that we have allowed ourselves to live like the Gentiles in the futility of their minds?

This is an image I found titled "Small Closet Solutions."
hmmmmmmm.

Blessings,
Deb

Time to Act

Ephesians 4:20-24
But you did not learn Christ in this way, if indeed you have heard Him and have been taught in Him, just as truth is in Jesus, that, in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.


Observations:
-We did not learn Christ this way, the futility of our minds, ignorance, darkness- we have been set free from all of that...
-IF- oh boy here it comes. IF.  It says to us, "I've no doubt you are Christians IF you are living a Christian life."
-Out with the old, in with the new.  Laying aside the old self is an interesting concept.  On the one hand it has already been done when we were born again, but Paul implies there is more to it than that.  It is also a daily process of taking up our cross and following Christ (Luke 9:23)
-Instead, be renewed in our minds and put on the "new self"-the likeness of God, marked by righteousness, holiness, and truth.  Be Like God.


Application:
"The proof is in the pudding."  "Actions speak louder than words."  However we want to say it, Paul is saying here that salvation requires evidence.  You can't live like the Gentiles, you need to walk worthy of your calling.

"Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it. Prone to leave the One I love."  This laying aside the old self is an ongoing process.  Yes, the work was accomplished on the cross, but while I walk this earth there is a battle going on.  The old self still wants to be in control, it wants the place of honor back, and I have to be on guard daily not to let that happen.  Each morning when I get up I have to decide to set my feet on the right path- to walk in a manner worthy of my calling.

How do I go about laying aside the old self?  By renewing my mind- which means to make it like new again, pure, innocent, and as Paul states, in the image of God.  When I think about all that inundates us these days; all that we let in through the radio, television, internet- what am I letting my mind dwell on?  That which is pure and lovely and worthy of praise?  That which helps me to walk in a manner worthy?  Phillipians 4:8 states, "Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is worthy of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things."  Let my mind dwell on these things.


There is a song that Kathy Troccoli sings that I often think of when I first wake up in the morning that starts like this:
Every morning there is a choice to be made
If I'm gonna follow and walk in the path that You laid
But, sometimes I'm lazy, You know it, Jesus
Sometimes I'm bold and I'm strong
But You know my heart and my greatest desire is You

I want no more of that old self.  I long to live as one whose mind is renewed.  I know the choice I have to make.

Blessings,
Deb

Something Has Changed

Sripture:
Ephesians 4:17-19, NASB
So this I say, and affirm together with the Lord, that you walk no longer just as the Gentiles also walk, in the futility of their mind,  being darkened in their understanding, excluded from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, because of the hardness of their heart: and they, having become callous, have given themselves over to sensuality for the practice of every kind of impurity with greediness.


Observation:
-So this I say, therefore- what is therefore there for- point us back to 4:1,walk in a manner worthy
 -Paul is not the only one saying this but the Lord Himself is also affirming it.  We don't have to take Paul's word for it- God Himself stands behind this.
-Something has changed- the way we walk as Gentiles.  -The former Gentile mind was useless (futility is defined as uselessness); being darkened, ignorant,and separated from God.  The former Gentile heart was hardened and callous.  The former Gentile life was given over to all kinds of immorality because it was focused on oneself.

I saw this image and thought about how different our view is
as Gentiles who have been saved by grace.

Application:
We live in a "Me" centered society.
We live in a society darkened in their understanding.  We live in a society that does everything it can to keep God separate.
My life is not to be like that.
My life is to be marked by godly pursuits, not those futile things that lead to darkness and ignorance.

Blessings,
Deb

Time to Grow Up

Ephesians 4:14-16
As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming; but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him who is the head, even Christ, for whom the whole body, being fitted and held together by what every joint supplies, according to the proper working of each individual part, causes the growth of the body for the building up of itself in love.


Observations:
As a result of the equipping going on I am supposed to grow up.  I am supposed to grow in a way that anything false is immediately known to me. I am supposed to know better than any trickster that may come along.
I need to speak the truth and I need to do so in love.  (Motivation)
My growth needs to be all-encompassing, every aspect means just that, leaving nothing out- every bit of myself.
The picture of the body- Christ is the head, the rest of us our joined together, fitted and held together and working well together because every individual part is working properly.
And when every individual is working properly the whole body grows, built up by love.

Application:
This first part is near and dear to my heart.  We sat under a pastor for several years who often said that when people are trained to spot counterfeit money they first spend time studying the real thing.  Because they know the genuine one so well they can easily spot the counterfeit.  I did a little research and found that this little anecdote that we often hear is quite true.  We need to know the truth.  We need to read and study God's Word so that we quickly recognize false teaching, and it is out there dear friends.  One of the interesting lines I as I researched this was that the government expects individuals to be responsible for recognizing whether the money they receive is the real deal or not.  Individual responsibility.  I think this fits in very well with the ideas presented by Paul here.  While it is wise to seek the counsel of others when discerning the truth, we bear a responsibility to know it well ourselves.  The more we know about God's Word, God's character and God's ways, the less likely we are to be fooled by "every wind of doctrine."  My time spent in the Word and prayer is more than just a daily ritual that makes me feel good or another check mark on my good-girl to do list- it is vital to my ability to discern the truth, and then to be able to speak that truth in love to others.  I believe it is also vital to keeping me in proper working order, individually, doing my part within the body.

Two questions I am asking myself:
Am I in proper working order- doing my part for the whole body?  Am I trying to be the head, or letting Christ have His proper place?


Blessings,
Deb

Equipped For Service

Ephesians 4: 9-13
(Now this expression, "He ascended,"  what does it mean except that He also descended into the lower parts of the earth?  He who descended is Himself also He who ascended far above all the heavens, so that He might fill all things.)  And He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building of the body of Christ; until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ.


Observations:
Jesus was here on earth, He came down from heaven, and He rose again back to His place beside God the Father.  He left us with people who could teach us, guide us, equip us for the work He wants us to do; a work that involves building the body.  He expects us to grow in our understanding, to attain maturity.


Application:
How am I doing at listening to those Jesus has given me to equip me for service?  To pastors and teachers, to the words of the apostles found in Scripture.  God has given us such a great resource in the Word- what am I doing with it?

Christ did not sacrifice Himself for me so that I would just sit on my hands and feel good about things. There is an ongoing work He wants me to be a part of.  I feel compelled to write.  I feel compelled to share with others what I am learning by leading Bible studies and blogging.  It is totally humbling to think that He has perhaps made me a teacher for equipping the saints.  Yikes!  That thought leaves me breathless and shaking, I have got to do a good work myself of preparing myself to be used in such a way.  What good is anything I have to offer if I do not spend much time with Him first- if I do not spend time getting myself equipped for the work He has given me?

Blessings,
Deb

We Are One in the Spirit

Ephesians 4:4-8
There is one body and one Spirit; just as you also were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.  But to each one of us grace was given according to the measure of Christ's gift.  Therefore it says, "When He ascended on high, He led captive a host of captives, and He gave gifts to men."


(I "typoed" at first and ended up with "and He gave gifts to me."  I liked that.)

Observations:
ONE- there is one: body, Spirit, hope, Lord, faith, baptism, God and Father of all.
Each and every one of us has been given grace, "according to the measure of Christ's gift- which as we know is immeasurable.
Christ ascended (implied descended) and "led captive a host of captives" (see Psalm 68 for the passage quoted by Paul here) and gave gifts to ME (men).

Application:
The idea of unity: Paul is back again to say that there is no difference, not Jew or Gentile- we are all one, brought together by the same God and Father of us all.  Same needs to be applied in our churches today, and even in our families.  We are not Baptist nor Methodist nor Presbyterian nor Church of Christ nor..., or the myriad of factions that exist even within denominations- we are one-one in Christ.  I must affirm again the need to be one who preserves unity rather than brings discord to the body of Christ.

The last verse gave me some trouble.  What in the world does that mean?  I believe Jesus ascended into heaven, but who are the captives He led.  Two thoughts, one based on 1 Peter 3:18-20- after the cross Christ descended to the "lower parts of the earth" (Eph. 4:9.)  Peter tells us that Christ went to proclaim something to the disobedient spirits imprisoned there. Jesus went there not to preach to them but to make a proclamation and I believe that proclamation was that He had won the war- sin and death are defeated.  Several sources say that the word used here is the OT word for Sheol-and it is believed that here on one level the OT saints were in waiting for Jesus, and on the lower level the angels of disobedience are locked away for now until the time of judgement (2 Peter 2:4)
My second thought is based upon the idea of the spoils of war.  to the victor go the spoils- and the victor in this war is Jesus Christ.  Every one of us, those alive now and those from the beginning of time, were captive to sin.  I wonder if Paul is linking this to the idea of being a prisoner of Christ- no longer are we prisoners of sin, but prisoners of Christ and we will be taken up with Him someday in great victory.
Whatever my beliefs about those things, one thing is abundantly clear to me.  The price Christ paid on the cross for me is not to be taken lightly. To each one of us grace was given; the immeasurable gift we have received through Christ. Through His suffering and death came great victory, and the gifts I have been given as a result need to be well-used in light of that fact.

Blessings,
Deb